Scattered stats and thoughts regarding Week 14 of the 2012 NFL Season…
3. Baltimore, on the other hand, is the master of playing almost EXACTLY to their opponents’ capabilities. This isn’t a particularly useful skill when you should be blowing out Kansas City and are instead needing a dubious roughing-the-passer penalty to get out of Arrowhead with a three-point win. But it IS useful when your next three games are against the Broncos, Giants, and Bengals. Cincinnati and Pittsburgh’s losses yesterday basically assure the AFC North title will go to Baltimore, which in turn likely assures us all that the Ravens will win one playoff game and then lose a heartbreaker in the second round. That whole playing to the level of your competition thing, you know.
Quick Thought: One of many games from yesterday in which the Adjusted Yards per Play metric thinks the wrong team won. In Cincinnati’s case, they lost because they kicked three field goals deep in the red zone instead of coming away with touchdowns. Thoughts and prayers go out to the families of Jerry Brown and Josh Brent.
Quick Thought: Every all-time great running back has one season where you could try to stop them by lining up eleven tanks on defense and nuking the crap out of them but it wouldn’t matter because they’d just run through them or around them anyway (or, in the case of Jim Brown, both). Coming into this year, the unquestioned best back of this era, Adrian Peterson, hadn’t really had that one year where you look at his final stat line and scream GAHHHH KILL IT WITH FIRE. Suffice it to say, I think he may be having that year in 2012.
Quick Thought: What a weird game. The Giants couldn’t really stop the Saints and Eli HERPED and DERPED more than a few times throwing the ball decades late into blanket coverage. On the other hand, the Saints’ kick return coverage seemed to consist of toddlers from local daycare establishments and Drew Brees continued his quest to score twenty-one points with one throw. Plus, Troy Aikman and Joe Buck had an awkward running dialogue about Buck’s suit throughout the game. Just a strange day all around.
Quick Thought: I like to think that after the Lions got up 14-0 on the Packers last night, they thought to themselves, “All right, we’ve proved ourselves to be talented, let’s tank the rest of this one so we get a better draft pick in April and easier schedule next year.” Of course, even if that was the case last night, it doesn’t really explain what they were thinking in their four prior losses…
Quick Thought: At one point late in the first half, both Philip Rivers and Ben Roethlisberger had thrown for forty-two yards each and were apparently in a contest to see who could do the most damage to their yards per attempt average. Like he has all season, Rivers won that battle handily. Yet somehow, even though the Steelers averaged nearly two more yards per play, they got blown out by a 4-8 Chargers team. Asked why he thought the Steelers were so inconsistent, Roethlisberger said, “I have no clue. If I knew I don’t think we’d do it anymore.” Good to know!
Quick Thought: Anybody else take an, ahem, active interest in how Colin Kaepernick’s last fourth-quarter run turned out? Given that I had picked the 49ers at -10.5, I was obviously standing up at the dinner table while clenching my fork with white knuckles and repeatedly shouting, “DON’T STOP AT THE ONE! DON’T STOP AT THE ONE!” And he didn’t! Would it have technically been a smarter play to stop at the one, so that your team could just kneel out the rest of the clock and not worry about further injury to your players in meaningless action? Of course. But on behalf of all people who picked the Niners yesterday, I’d like to stand and salute Colin Kaepernick for his selfish decision to score the touchdown. Godspeed, buddy.
Quick Thought: What…what’s going on here? Carolina thoroughly outplayed a team and actually won? Atlanta got thoroughly outplayed, then started a crazy comeback and still lost? Who’s in charge of the narrative around here, guys? Someone forgot to edit the ending properly…
Quick Thought: Andrew Luck’s pick-six while on his knees was A): wholly hilarious and B): obviously not a pick-six, since his knees were on the ground. I’d say that was one of the worst replay rulings of recent vintage, but I had Tennessee at +5.5. So, simply put, I thought it was a tough call and further indisputable evidence – such as a signed confession from Luck, perhaps, or a DNA sampling from the field – was needed to overturn it.
- Lucas (5:02 P.M.): Holy crap Seattle.
- Nathaniel (5:05 P.M.): I stand by my Cardinals pick! I stand by my Cardinals pick!
- Lucas (5:09 P.M.): We’re sure the line wasn’t Seattle -49.5, right?
- Nathaniel (5:11 P.M.): They switched the line on ESPN.com to Sea -63.5 at the last minute today, didn’t you see?
Sadly he didn’t fall for it.
Quick Thought: The difference between the Rams’ turnaround season from 2010 and their turnaround season this year is strength of schedule. Despite winning seven games and coming agonizingly close to the NFC West title in 2010, they played the easiest schedule in the league; there wasn’t actually that much to get excited about once stripped away the crappy teams. This year, however, they’re going .500 despite facing the toughest schedule in the league. They’ve got two semi-juggernauts in San Francisco and Seattle ahead of them currently, so it’s tough to say exactly that the future looks rosy for the Rams. But certainly there’s more reason for hope there than any time since Mike Martz was affiliated with the team. Yep, it’s been a while.
Quick Thought: Call of the day goes to Terry Bradshaw announcing Nick Foles’ glacially-paced touchdown scramble: “Golly is he slow.” Didn’t even try to reference fried chicken in the same breath. Well done, Terry!
Quick Thought: Look at Jacksonville’s Adjusted Yards per Play, Tim! That is what you’ve been missing out on this year by choosing the Jets over the Jags. It’s okay, we all make mistakes…
Quick Thought: In today’s Sign That You Should Probably Be Just A Little Worried About Friday the 21st: the Browns have now won three in a row. TIME TO HEAD TO BIG LOTS AND LOAD UP ON BOTTLED WATER AND CANNED PEACHES. The end is nigh.
Someone Still Loves You, Alberto Riveron 